So, who's being unreasonable here?

I find that unreasonable people, or unreasonable behaviour are often the factor of being a public enemy.
Like unreasonable people on the news or the Internet, often being criticised by the many.
Which draws my interest to understand just what makes the word unreasonable, and also to avoid being the public enemy.

The word unreasonable, as defined by many dictionaries, can be broken up into many different points.
It describes an act that is not governed by reason, or that is lacking reason or judgement.
It can also be use to describe people that are not reasonable or showing good judgement, or people who refuse to listen to reason.
As much as there seem to nothing wrong with the examples given above, i find these definitions rather unreasonable.
Again, before we go into something so deep, i would like to share a short story of an unreasonable person as well.

This took place in 2012, It was a winter night, and a raining one.
A homeless man was freezing or, perhaps, dying if he still continues to roam the streets of Orlando.
Feeling as if he was about to die, he decided to call for help, or maybe look for one instead.
He came upon this house, the only one that was in sight within a mile.
Desperate as he is, he decided to try his luck and knocked on the door.
Hoping that he would get some help in return of his effort.
Answering the door was a fine looking lady in her twenties, upon seeing the man and despite hearing the intention of his arrival, the lady slammed the door shut.
The man died on the very night, freezing to death.

That lady in the story seems pretty unreasonable, isn't it?
I mean, leaving an old man, in such helpless state.
Leaving an old man to die, even when she has the capability to lend a helping hand.
That's just something we cannot comprehend, isn't it only reasonable and only right to help the man?
But before we come to such conclusions, i would like to share with you the story about this lady as well.

This took place in 2007, It was a winter night, and a raining one.
A homeless man was freezing or, perhaps dying if he still continues to roam the streets of Orlando.
Feeling as if he was about to die, he decided to call for help, or maybe look for one instead.
He came upon this house, the only one that was in sight within a mile.
Desperate as he is, he decided to try is luck and knocked on the door.
Hoping that he would get some help in return of his effort.
Answering the door was a the very same lady, and upon seeing the man and hearing the intention of his arrival, the lady invited the man in and gave him blankets and served him a hot beverage almost immediately.
The lady was raped on that very night, leaving scars even time couldn't heal.

So, after hearing such an experience the lady went through in the past.
Is she still unreasonable?
Is she is not reasonable, not showing good judgement?
Isn't it only right and reasonable to be having reaction?
Isn't it only logical to be behaving in such a manner?
Haven't it occurred to you that the unreasonable people that you're seeing in your life right now might be stung by unpleasant experience as well?
That these are logical and reasonable decisions made by them because they do not want to suffer from the same pain again?

What you cannot understand doesn't mean it's wrong.

In my opinion, i think we tend to use these words too often, too fast.
Too easily, in a way that we would just label them as unreasonable if their reaction is not commonly accepted by the many.
But by coming to a judgement even before we try to understand them.
By using the word unreasonable even before we try to know their reasons for such actions.
Haven't we fall under people who refuse to listen to reason?

So, who's being unreasonable here?

Signing off,
Sleepy Spidey. (:

Being persistent or simply, just stubborn?

Persistence, often named as one of the key to success and are always tagged with famous people, including big names such as Thomas Edison, Alexander The Great and many more.
While stubbornness, on the other hand, only leads you to mistakes and failures most of the time.
But, just what made the difference between these two words?
Before we go into something so serious, here's one story to share, and which many of you will find it familiar too.

     The Boy and the Starfish

A man was walking along a deserted beach at sunset.

As he walked he could see a young boy in the distance, as he drew nearer he noticed that the boy kept bending down, picking something up and throwing it into the water.

Time and again he kept hurling things into the ocean.

As the man approached even closer, he was able to see that the boy was picking up starfish that had been washed up on the beach and, one at a time he was throwing them back into the water.

The man asked the boy what he was doing, the boy replied,"I am throwing these washed up starfish back into the ocean, or else they will die through lack of oxygen.

"But", said the man, "You can't possibly save them all, there are thousands on this beach, and this must be happening on hundreds of beaches along the coast.

You can't possibly make a difference.

"The boy smiled, bent down and picked up another starfish, and as he threw it back into the sea, he replied.

"I made a huge difference to that one!"

-Author Unknown.

Now, let's not go into how inspiring this story is, but instead look at it from another angle.
So talking about the boy in the story, was he being persistent or plainly, just stubborn?
Tough call, but there won't be any right or wrong answers.
Funny as it may seems, but here's why.
If thousands of people decided to join him in his cause, which i believe that the you who's reading this right now would love to be part of them, and in turn creating a fairytale like ending whereby all the starfishes were saved.
He would, be a boy whose persistence save all the starfishes.
But then again, he would be named the stubborn boy who refuses to give up after hearing what the adult has got to say, if he's still doing what he is doing at that time, alone.
Same story, different ending. and it would change the way you look at it, seems interesting, isn't it?

So, what actually made the difference between these two words?
Success, unfortunately, is one of the key factors.
Same goes to Thomas Edison, what if none of his inventions worked?
What if Alexander The Great lost one of his seemingly impossible battle and caused the downfall of his kingdom?
They would also, be categorised under "stubborn boys who refused to give up".

The transition from stubbornness to persistence, is mainly determined by success.
The only thing that drew the line between being stubborn and being persistent is again determined by the society.
As definition of success itself, is also determined by the majority.
Which means to say,
stubborness today might just be tomorrow's persistence.
Just imagine that you're a friend of Thomas Edison before his invention ever worked, or a soldier under Alexander The Great before he established his kingdom.
Did Thomas Edison look stubborn when he refused to give up even after thousands of experiments?
Did Alexander The Great look stubborn when he decided not to retreat despite the fact that he was outnumbered?

I'm sure Thomas Edison was mocked at, being treated like a stubborn fool before he was acknowledged as who he is in our modern days.
I'm sure Alexander The Great's ability on the battlefield was questioned and doubted before he established his kingdom.
Personally, being stubborn or persistent, they all mean the same thing to me.
it only mean fighting till the end without giving up.
And if you happen to be attempting to make drastic changes to your initial doings just to avoid being called stubborn or mocked at, think again.
If deep inside, you truly feel that the things you choose to hold on to is with the right intention and for the right reason.
May i please ask of you to hold on to that little piece of stubbornness for a little longer, and just think.

How could the world have change, by the changes you are about to make?

Lastly, i truly appreciate the time taken to read this article.

Signing off,
Sleepy Spidey. (:



How stereotyping could actually be good?

Stereotype, or rather stereotyping is often blamed, in articles and essays regarding major issues such as racism, religion or even gender, labelled as a form of prejudice.
Like Muslims were often linked with terrorism, and i believe we all share the same view about female drivers, don't we?
Jokes aside, but stereotyping isn't as evil as others claimed.
It only means making  simplified conceptions of groups based on prior assumption, something similar to what we always say, judging a book from its cover.

Now, despite having a better understanding of what stereotyping is, but it still doesn't have anything that says of it being positive or good.
Well, it doesn't.
But please give me a few minutes and allow me to explain myself further, using an interesting concept that i found online earlier on.

Looking Glass Self.

I believe the picture above has given you a brief idea on what does it actually means.
The looking-glass self is a concept, created by Charles Horton Cooley in 1902, stating that a person's self grows out of society's interpersonal interactions and the perceptions of others.
Which causes people to reinforce other people's perspectives on themselves.
People shaped themselves based on what other people perceive and confirm other people's opinion on themselves.
Charles Horton Cooley summed it up by saying, "I am not what I think I am and I am not what you think I am; I am what I think that you think I am."Meaning a person's behaviour or action could be indirectly led by the other people's opinion of themselves.
And it often varies from time to time, affected by the interactions with different groups of people, mainly because of the different impressions they have of us.
That explains why sometimes we feel that we are not behaving the same way in front of our parents like how we do when we are with our friends or boy girlfriends.

I mean, let's face it.
Deep inside we all want to be acknowledged, to be praised, and to be loved.
As much as we never admit it, we are all trying to live up to the expectations of others, be it the good or the bad ones.
Like, the slowest eater in the group, the one who is always late, and the one who never fails to smile everyday.
But even if you agree with whatever I've said, it still doesn't really give stereotyping a better name, right?

Here's where the transformation begin.

Like a sword, it can both kill and protect.
Let's look at it this way. if everybody is going to be who they think you think that they are.
YOU WILL HAVE THE ABILITY TO CHANGE THE WORLD.let's just imagine this, if we were to start anew, to remove all the negative impressions about certain groups of people.
And instead, believe that every single person out there as if they are good people.
They might just turn out to be really good people.
The ladies might start to be driving as good as Lewis Hamilton too.

After reading this, i hope that we all can start doing our part, by believing that there is a good in everybody out there.
Starting from that teen who just got wasted during the Christmas party. (:

Once again, I appreciate the time taken to read this humble piece of mine.

Signing off,
Sleepy Spidey. (:

ARE YOU NORMAL?

ARE YOU NORMAL?

Seems like a silly question to ask, but may i please ask of just minutes of your time to hear what i have to say below.
If you ever search the definition of normal in the net, which wouldn't be normal for a normal person to do it, the following would be probably what you'll find.

nor·mal (nôrml)
adj.
1. Conforming with, adhering to, or constituting a norm, standard, pattern, level, or type; typical: normal room temperature; one's normal weight; normal diplomatic relations.
2. Biology Functioning or occurring in a natural way; lacking observable abnormalities or deficiencies.
3. Abbr. n or N Chemistry
a. Designating a solution having one gram equivalent weight of solute per liter of solution.
b. Designating an aliphatic hydrocarbon having a straight and unbranched chain of carbon atoms.
4. Mathematics
a. Being at right angles; perpendicular.
b. Perpendicular to the direction of a tangent line to a curve or a tangent plane to a surface.
5.
a. Relating to or characterized by average intelligence or development.
b. Free from mental illness; sane.
n.
1. Something normal; the standard: scored close to the normal.
2. The usual or expected state, form, amount, or degree.
3.
a. Correspondence to a norm.
b. An average.
4. Mathematics A perpendicular, especially a perpendicular to a line tangent to a plane curve or to a plane tangent to a space curve.
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[Middle English, from Late Latin normlis, from Latin, made according to the square, from norma, carpenter's square; see gn- in Indo-European roots.]
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normal·ly adv.
The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2009. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

I have to admit that i was taken back by the results that i found.
It has definitely brought my English to a complete new level.
As much i have to admit that i wasn't a big fan of the thesaurus, i never knew the normal we use so much in our daily lives actually contains so many meanings.
The power of language, huh?
Never mind about that, let's go back to the main point. Honestly, throughout 19 years of my life. I've always thought that being normal was just, being the usual, default me.
Like for example, feeling so sad to a point that i wanted to die isn't normal, feeling so much physical pain in certain areas isn't normal too.
So therefore, i assume that being normal was just being the normal me, no pain no nothing. If you get what i mean.

But, i guess being normal wasn't just that. It says above that being normal means conforming with, adhering to, or constituting a norm, standard, pattern, level, or type.
As much as I know I'll never win a debate with guy who wrote that down. I'm afraid I have to admit that there are some parts which i don't really agree.
if being normal is conforming with the standard or norm, that what would be the NORMAL normal standard or norm be like?
if killing somebody is legal and common, does that mean you have to kill to be normal?
or if eating through your nostril is common and accepted by the majority, does that mean you would look weird if you continue to chew with your mouth?

I don't get it, I really don't.
Was there really detailed explanation for meeting the normal standard of every single thing, or all these patterns and norms were just simply set by the people who have the biggest say?

Like, if you're still doing the normal things that you're doing right now, and years later the people decided to change their views of it. does that mean you would be abnormal by then?

So, just what is normal?
If you're not being you by trying to fit in, trying to doing the things people are doing, then from some point of view, won't you be abnormal already?
By defying the patterns of your instinct,or your system that has been with your for the same number of years you've been born.

Hasn't that not fail you to be labelled as normal already?

From my understanding, names like 'freaks' and 'weirdo' get really common nowadays,used usually for the wrong reason.
and from what i can see, people are doing a lot, sometimes against their own wishes to avoid being called such names.
i can understand the reason behind it, as i was once like these people.
trying to stay low, trying to dress like all the other teens, trying our best, just to fit it. Many times, this is also made us forsake the gifts or talent that dwell within us.
just to be labelled as NORMAL.

I just wanted to say, to all those who's reading this, if you ever face similar problems trying your best, doing whatever you can to fit in.

Here's something for you guys before i go.
Conforming with the norm, is just a trend. So being yourself is still the best. (:

Lastly, i just wanted to thank you guys for the time taken to read this article of mine. As much as i know my language isn't good enough to be writing, it is really something i wanted to share badly.

Signing off,
Sleepy Spidey. (: